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The general Narcissistic cycle goes something like this – Narcissist finds new meat, lavishes her with attention and moves really fast – he keeps former girlfriends on ice by feeding them hope and nuggets of attention and affection – the new meat loses her shine and she gets relegated to the harem – he may bounce back to an old harem member in the interim while he looks for someone new and on and on it goes.The women he meets could be beautiful, have a great job, good friends and money in the bank. It’s never about her and it will always turn out the same way.
I’m not saying men and women can’t be ‘just’ friends, but that distinction happens only when both parties have absolutely no interest in being together. With their charm they can usually swoop any woman off their feet, but their specialty lies in their ability to keep women hanging on. Sussing out those that are overly giving, that rationalize and make excuses for other people’s bad behavior and those that the Narcissist has successfully managed down their expectations, so that they treat every little nugget of attention like a lottery winning.This woman even knew that he was dating other women and was willing at all costs to still have him in her life.Somewhere in the back of our minds, in some crazy rationale we tell ourselves things like, “oh he’ll date someone else and then realize how much better he had it with me and he’ll come back.” That might be true in the short term, but by showing him that you’ll put up with him dating other women, he’ll do just that and then come back when that doesn’t work out and then leave again…all the while you are on an emotional rollercoaster never knowing where you stand or when he’s coming or going.Let’s be honest, a jealous woman can be incredibly devious and catty and guy with a harem, needing to be constantly reassured, would run to these ‘friends,’ and since they wanted me out of the picture their advice was always unflattering and self-serving. I had three or four of them send me friend requests on Facebook, looking to snoop into my life, hoping to dig up some kind of dirt.My appearance, my behavior was constantly under scrutiny by the harem and I had to eventually hit the pavement, because it felt like I was dating him and every other woman he had ever been involved with.